Monday, 11 April 2011

Shocked and tired

Today I went with Stuart to his cardiology appointment. Basically, the doctor said he needs a double bypass but they are not sure they can carry it out in his case and they need further discussion before making a decision. If they don't do it, he will take beta blockers for the rest of his life instead. If they do the op, it will be in a couple of weeks. Naturally, I want to be here and we have a conflict with my father's cremation. My mother is still waiting to hear if there has to be a post-mortem on my father's body, so we have no idea how soon a cremation service can be organised. And my daughters are in England not knowing if they are coming here to Germany as planned for Easter with us, staying in England so they can go to the cremation, or coming here to Germany a couple of weeks later so they can be here if Stuart is operated on. I was worried about Stuart when I was in Sylt but had no idea my world would be turned upside-down when I got back. I want to be with my mother, sister and brother, but also want to be with my husband. I need a cloning service. Feeling torn and sad.

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